(no subject)

Wow, so many good things have just happened! I got the job as musical presenter. The audition yesterday went really badly. There was a middle aged mutton dressed as lamb lady and there was a cool, primary school teacher type, and then there was me. The audition began with an introduction, in which we had to say our names, what animal we are and why, and what our colour was and why etc. The first lady said she was a dog, because she was loyal, and that her colour was blue, maybe with white, ooh, maybe white around the outside, because she was calm like the north pole. The sheep lady said she was a butterfly and that her colour was green. Then it was my turn. I said I was a cat, because cats are warm and furry and like to curl up in people's laps - not that I like curling up in people's laps you understand. In fact, now that I think about it, cats are horrible creatures who decimate Australian wildlife, so maybe this means I am really a vicious killing machine. By which time everyone was laughing, but I was sure it was in a bad way. So I rallied and said I was brown or red because I was earthy and warm and kind. Ha! Good wank recovery. Then we sang our songs. The cool lady did hers first, complete with cardboard cutout fish props. She was really good. Then it was my turn, and for my prop I used a pair of goggles and told a story complete with smimming mime about fish and then sang the song. Only I forgot the words halfway through and inadvertently swore, cheerfully, and then carried on. I sang the frog song next, the one where frogs go la di da di da. That was really fun. The sheep lady hadn't prepared and she was terrible. Then they said thankyou, looking all the time at the cool lady. The crazy sheep lady gave me a lift home, and she turned out to be actually very cool, because she sings in a fifties and sixties style band and does musicals. We had big chats. At the very end she said the cool lady was going to get the job and I agreed with her.

When the woman called and said I had the job I didn't believe her and asked her if she was sure.

Did I tell you about the nude modelling? It is the most fun thing in the entire world. Being naked is not at all a bad thing. To be honest, I have seldom ever been made to feel better about myself or more beautiful. It was so creative. They had me posing in all sorts of positions. They really liked my hair and used it as a dramatic prop. It was so lovely to be used as an artistic medium, because I wasn't a naked girl with lots of imperfections, I was a shape and a quantity that they were playing with. It was incredibly comfortable. But I am now very sore, particularly my back and shoulders, from when they had me propped up on my elbows arched backwards. The lecturer and I got on really well. He turned out to be from Hartlepool and he was most amused to discover that I lived near Middlesborough. He was delighted when he found out that Lizzie and I are partners because there's a possibility that we could pose together. So, lots of modelling work coming up, plus wonderful new job singing to kids!

I picked up the script today and I have to be all these different characters. This is just like running a children's tour, only no ghosts obviously and with songs in.

I get to be Pedro the Mexican!

Now I promise, finally, to stop being so miserable and upset. What would make me really happy is if I could step in with dockside comedy when the two boys leave. Then Lizzie and I could work together and eat pizza and she could teach me how to tech and it'd be really fun. That would be perfect.

Nice to hear from you, Ross, hope you're looking after my boys. Give Paul and Curly my love - in fact, get them to read the livejournal and then I could talk to them. In the meantime though, give them hugs from me. (Give Paul extra big hug. Don't tell April!)

Lastly, I would just like to say that Lizzie is the most beautiful girl in the entire world. Even though we have spent all our money accidentally, lived in hovels, had fights, (small ones) been in despair and sometimes not been able to afford vegetables, I am still in love with her. She is delicious.

Bye everyone, love you, byeee,
Ari.

P.S: Alex you are crap and clearly unable to meet deadlines. Though it's quite nice the story for Christmas thing, and may turn into a Cass siblings tradition if we keep this up.

Hello

Hello people,

It think Ari might be updating too. Or sending an email. Or maybe chatting online to her other lover. (oh no!)

I am considerably chirpier at the moment, you'll be pleased to know after my last suicidal rant. Largely this is due to Ari's Big Exciting News, which she will tell you herself.

I don't normally respond to anonymous requests for information on my nudity, but... I've modelled with my clothes on in the past and have always fancied doing more, clothed or unclothed. OS I randomly emailed the photography college and got a gig. they're crying out for people I think. I did it last Saturday. It's really fun and really relaxing - you completely forget you have no clothes on. HE asked me to do it again but I was working but told him (John, guy in charge) I knew a girl who could...which is how Ari got the gig on Thursday. She enjoyed it, and Mike who was taking that class asked her to do it again. He had also been at the class on Saturday and asked Ari how she knew me.
'We're partners'
'Oh really, what business do you run?'
Having got what she meant, he wants to know if we'd do stuff together - it must be quite rare for an artist to get to work with 2 nudes. So that'll be going on sometime soon.

This brings me to a slight Australia rant. The word 'girlfriend' here is used in the American context 'I met my girlfriend for lunch, then went home to my husband' kind of thing. Which means that when referring to Ari I either call her my girlfriend, in which case people take it to mean we are good friends and travelling together (which ok is true) or I refer to her as my partner, in which case people either think I mean a man and I have the explanation to do, or people know it's a woman and think I'm trying to cover up that it's a lesbain relationship. I mean, fuck, what am I supposed to call her? My woman? My bitch? My hoe? The little lady? Answers on a postcard. [/end of rant]

Work at the comedy club (www.docksidecomedybar.com.au if anyone's interested, though the website's being redone) is going fabulously. Not only am I doing the door, and the tech from time to time (they call it DJing. It's not DJing, it's teching. I'm a techie, people) but I have now been given work in the office, some data entry, and some proper exciting work.

Quote from Dave (boss) on phone to Syndey comedy agency 'Well we have a new member on our staff now, she's a promoter over from Scotland, she's helping us with some new publicity'

He lurves me! And he's lovely, really sweet, offered me his car to drive home in the other day. And his wife's just found out she's pregnant. It's all so lovely. Point is, I'm doign proper press and publicity stuff that I've done a thousand times before but this time I'm actually getting paid!! Currently I'm semi designing, mainly just writing text for their new brochure. Some of this is cobbled from biog/press things they send, but for the less organised comedians I'm having to a)write a blurb for them on the basis I've seen them or b)look them up on the internet, decide things about them and write stuff based on that and make everyone sound interesting. I'm having such a brilliant time and learning shitloads into the bargain. It's great. I'm thinking of doing a TAFE(college) course in graphis design to help me being able to do more.

MOst brilliant is Ari having stuff now though. It's been really weird with me workig and her getting progressively more depressed. Working a job that isn't sales (did we tell you about the day on telesales?) is fucking hard in this country. I really lucked out with Dockside, but I think a lot of people distrusted that all of both our experience, training etc was in the UK.

Talking of which, Australia is really racist. Really fucking racist. In an engrained and socially acceptable manner. Standing about with work acquaintances talking about what a load of wankers the aboriginals, particularly the women, is not considered unusual. The comedians on at Dockside are casually, uneducatedly and, most crucially, unfunnily (which is not a word I know) racist about Aboriginals, Africans, Indians, Chinese..the list goes on. I find it amazing. Something needs to be done.

What else? Jacqui's moved out!!!! Yey!!!!! The house is so much groovier.

I have learnt how to make macaroni cheese.

My bedbug bites are starting to heal.

I have started drinking beer.

I need another haricut.

Photos soon, I promise.

SO lovely to hear from Naomi!!!! We've been worried about you. And people, next time she's in town and wants to meet you, you are charged to reply with laughter and good wine (or slightly shit wine) by order of Miss Elizabeth of Maran.

Wine is cheap here. The best deal we've had is cleanskin wine (someone probably knows why it's called that, it basically doesn't have a proper label) where we got a drinkable bottle of red wine for $3.22. That's about one pound fifty. Wow. I like it here.


Wine-wise. I still miss everyone. Still no letters. I check our mailbox evey day and never anything. Poor little me...

Kev, congratulations on graduating. You rock.

Ross, stop drinking. Or send some to us.

Sian, you're cool.

Georgie, you're lovely.

Erin, well done on finishing your thingy. Will it be online? Otherwise, send us a copy.

Morag and Bex, we both just finished reding FingerSmith. Excellent book.

Also read The French Lieutenant's Woman. Bit wierd, that one. Took fucking forever too.


Better go. Love you all. Reminder to all lurkers to post more often (Richard? Tristan? Tim? Anyone?)


Byeeee!!!!

Lxxx

PS Apparently Ariadne is a descendant of Ethelred the Unready. Hmm

PPS when we have prints of our naked photos we'll post some but flash big warnings for people who really just don't want to see that. Georgie, mainly. (they won't be rude anyway. It's art)